A generous spirit

At the moment I’m exploring a range of possible avenues for my writing. As I’ve mentioned here before, I’m very passionate about getting into the therapeutic side of books. I love the concept that my books could be part of a resilience program or an anti-bullying program or a fundraiser for a charity, for example. I am also one who believes that experiences, be they good or bad, are never a waste if we learn from them. I’m at a bit of a crossroads, however, and have to think carefully about a particular avenue that has opened up for me.

A few years ago I worked for a non-profit group that was an advocacy agency for children and children’s issues. I’m not going to name them here because a.) it would look like sour grapes and b.) I don’t want to burn any bridges. The work they did was fantastic, and to this day I still support their mission. There is no doubt that they help a great many children in need. I was employed as the Program Director for my state, which was a lovely sounding title but in essence meant that I wrote my own job description. I was the only presence of the company in my state as I had approached them to see if they wanted to expand their services. They took me up on my offer and employed me part-time at what I would consider to be pretty base-line wages. It was certainly a lot less than what I could have earned teaching. But on the upside, I could work from home and had the autonomy to pick and choose which direction I wanted to go, so I figured it was worth working for less for the lifestyle it afforded me.

After trying to sell their amazing optimistic thinking skills program to schools and discovering that many schools had similar programs already in place, I looked elsewhere for opportunities. I discovered that there was a great deal of interest from the foster care sector. After following up some leads and generally pitching myself and my ideas to a few groups (I discovered I’m actually pretty comfortable in a sales role. I never would have thought that in a millions years!!), one particular organisation really took a shine to me and my ideas. As a result, I was able to be the driving force behind the creation of an optimistic thinking skills program for kids in foster care and their families. It was so very exciting! I was able to use all my teaching experience and create fun, games-based activities that taught the essential skills of optimism in a family situation. I was partnered with a colleague from the non-profit who had many years’ experience in foster care. Her perspective was invaluable. Although I had come across kids in care while I was teaching, I simply didn’t have the knowledge of some of the issues, behaviours and characteristics of foster care kids that would make some activities that I would use with an ‘ordinary’ group of kids unsuitable. She was also a very creative person and gave me a lot of ideas and input into the development of the program.

Finally, after months of planning, negotiating and cutting and pasting (I put all the kits together by hand), we launched the program with 13 participants. My colleague and I co-facilitated the workshops. The training was spread out over 3 months with the families attending training every 6 weeks or so, and being introduced to the next phase of the program. The feedback from the participants was a real buzz for me. Over and over, both carers and social workers assigned to families talked about the changes that were taking place inside them and also the little signs of change in the kids in their care. My hours and hours of work (a lot of which was unpaid – I voluntarily contributed a lot of the cutting and pasting time) had paid off. A few months later I got to present a 15-minute talk on the program to a national symposium on foster care. It was a humbling yet exhilarating experience for me. It was just awesome to be involved in something so powerful. And then my contract drew to an end and I was faced with some decisions.

When I first approached the non-profit group, I was toying with the idea of going into business for myself and merely acting as a consultant for them. I loved the idea of having my own business but I didn’t feel I had the networks, knowledge or experience to get it up and running, so I chose to work for the organisation. In the latter stages of my contract, I felt that I had learned enough to branch out on my own. I also felt that I had developed enough contacts in the industry to provide me with a fairly steady source of income. I knew the non-profit group were not going to be upset by that as in some ways it was easier for them to just sub-contract out to me. I wasn’t going to be competing against them, just delivering their programs in a different manner.

Over dinner one night at a conference, I told the General Manager and the Education Manager (who was my direct boss) that I wanted to go out on my own. They were very enthusiastic and supportive and encouraging. I mentioned how excited I was that I could use the program that had been ’my baby’ for the past year. That’s when they dropped the bombshell. I actually didn’t ‘own’ anything of what I’d created. Although the ideas had come from my brain and I’d developed many of them from scratch, I was officially employed at the time so therefore had no intellectual property rights. I was disappointed when I realised this, but figured there was nothing I could do about it, so just let it go. They were still excited about the program and were spending some money in research and development and were running a few more pilot programs to tweak it and evaluate it etc .

Fast forward a year or two and I had another baby (or in my case, two!) on the way. My business had slowed down by my choice as I prioritised my life. I got a lovely phone call from my colleague who was very excited to tell me she’d be in my state soon and had the new resource to show me. She had worked very hard over the period to get the material that we’d created for the pilot into something marketable. I was excited to see what the team had come up with, so you can imagine my disappointment when I saw the reality. The reality was, that although I was the instigator and brains behind the pilot, the only time my name was mentioned in the entire commercially-packaged and produced kit, was in the very small print at the back. “Thank you to Karen Collum for her ground work.” That was it. I was devastated. I knew that the program had changed significantly since my involvement. I knew she’d spent a lot of time sweating it out, getting it to where it was now, but I had expected that I would have been given credit for the activities I did create. I had expected that my name might be attached to one or more of the activities. And yet, being the non-confrontationalist that I am, I let it go. It just didn’t feel right to bring it up at the time.

I mulled over my own feelings around this for a long time. I felt ripped off. But had I been? Legally, the answer is no. Legally, the company owned all of that work, not me. But morally I felt like they had let me down. I felt like they hadn’t given me the gift of being associated with a program that I helped develop. I didn’t want equal footing with everyone else - I knew the program had gone further than I ever dreamed it could – but I felt like I couldn’t claim any association with it at all. If I did, I would look like I was trying to ride on somebody else’s coat tails. But then I took a deep breath and looked at the big picture. The big picture was that some kids and their families were benefiting from the creative ideas I’d had 4 years ago. And although what I’d created was good, it wasn’t my best work. I firmly believe my best work is in front of me. I chose to let the whole thing go and chalk it up to experience.

And now, I am in a situation where I have to make a decision. I have been working on a series of optimistic thinking skills novels. I know that this non-profit group would be the perfect place for me to get a foot in the door. In fact, I’ve put some feelers out and they are very interested. My novels could be marketed with their products, thereby adding weight and credibility to my concepts. Apart from my Bachelor of Education I don’t have any therapeutic qualifications. I’m new on the writing scene and people might wonder who I am. Being affiliated with an organisation that is well-known and well-respected in the community could be a good start for me. Plus, they have the avenues to get this book into the hands of people who need it most. They already have contacts in schools and group care homes and disability services. And so I have to decide, am I going to put myself out there again. The simple answer is yes. I have really thought this through and I’ve come to the conclusion that my response has got very little to do with what happened in the past and whatever injustices I feel occurred back then, and everything to do with the sort of person I want to be.

I was reading a great blog the other day, The Art of Non-Conformity. What I like about Chris’ approach is that he’s so counter-cultural when it comes to how to market, promote and sell yourself. Every second person will tell you to grab opportunities. Milk people for all they’re worth. Get a mailing list of people who read your blog and market, market, market. It’s the only way to make it big. Chris has a decidedly different approach. He has a generous spirit. He gives away a lot of his tips for free. Sure, there’s a shop attached to his blog but he’s the first to say, “Feel free to have a look around but don’t feel pressured to buy anything. And thanks for stopping by. It means a lot to me.” This is the sort of person I want to be. I don’t want to spend my life, hunched over my computer, protecting what is ‘mine’. I want to be generous in thought and action. I want to share the publishing opportunities with fellow writers. I want to celebrate other writers’ successes. And I don’t want to take advantage of relationships by always being on the lookout for opportunities to enhance my career. What’s the worst thing that can happen? Someone else might pinch my ideas. So be it. They won’t execute them in the same way, follow them through in the same way or write them the same way as me. That means I have nothing to fear. No-one can be imitate me. So that frees me up to act in a way that is indicative of what I value in life. I want to nurture generosity in my own life. I want to have a generous spirit. I want to make decisions for the greater good. And that’s exactly what I’m going to do.