A much-needed boost

After the agony of the past week or so and my very real confidence crisis, I have just received a much-needed boost. Through an online group of children’s writers I’m part of, I discovered that a few people were using a well-known Australian author for manuscript assessments. I’m not going to mention her name publicly here as I want to clear it with her first, but I will say she’s had a lot of success over many years. I previously hadn’t had a manuscript assessment done because I am all too aware that there are a lot of people out there who will gladly take your money and give you very little helpful advice whatsoever. When I heard who the manuscript assessor was, my ears pricked up. I’ve been reading her books for years! If anyone could give me a few pointers on what to improve, I was pretty sure she could.

The manuscript she assessed for me was Henny, the Guard Chook which has now undergone a name change (thanks to her and a friend who gave me similar feedback) to Operation Raspberry. All in all, she thought it was great! I can’t begin to tell you how wonderful that is for me to hear. To have someone who doesn’t know me at all, isn’t remotely concerned about my writerly-ego and doesn’t have to say nice things, tell me nice things about my writing is just lovely. Here’s some of what she had to say:

- the book is a lot of fun

- it was nice to read a primary school novel that wasn’t told in the first person. (I write more naturally in 3rd person at the moment so maybe that’s something that will set me apart from other writers right now??)

- she liked reading a manuscript that wasn’t full of spelling or grammatical errors. (Hooray for my attention to detail!!)

- the dialogue was spot on. (Really? I honestly thought dialogue was one of my weak points. I think in this case my characters were so believable that they spoke for themselves. I merely transcribed what they said )

- the affectionate family relationships were nicely drawn

- the writing style is good, as are the pace, characters and dialogue

Wow. I was delighted beyond words at an appraisal like that.  

Of course there were suggestions for improvement. I wouldn’t expect anything other than that. And the things she picked up on were very relevant, the first one being the inappropriateness of the original title. It really didn’t represent what the story is about and I’d actually decided to change it anyway. Her appraisal just confirmed my decision. Otherwise, her main concern revolved around the believability of the main event in the story.

The storyline is that someone is pinching Mum’s raspberries and Jack, the son, is going to find out who it is. He thinks it’s the old lady down the street (who used to win the jam making competitions until Mum entered) but it turns out to be his best friend’s Great Dane. I actually had a dog that ate raspberries, but as the assessor pointed out, they may not eat a whole patch but just nibble a few. So, I’ve gone back through the story and made reference to the dog’s unusually large appetite. I think that’s all I needed to do to make it believable. She’s a big dog with an even bigger appetite.

The other aspect that she picked up on was that that the family has a Jack Russell Terrier who are known for their territorial guard dog yapping and yet she didn’t alert them to the fact there was an intruder in the back yard. Tilly is very timid, so I’ve included a section that explains that she was attacked by another dog some time previously and since then has lost her bark. Once again a small addition to the story has closed that gap in logic.

So there you have it. I feel like I now have a manuscript that quite possibly is good enough to get published. And it’s a novel! (This is the point where I do cartwheels.) A junior novel, true, but a novel nonetheless, which gives me great hope that my Work In Progress can also get to this point someday! I also think that I will attempt to make a series out of Jack, Benny and Raspberry the dog. Just think – I’ve started with Operation Raspberry. Next I could have Trouble in the Raspberry Patch, The Raspberry Pickle, Raspberry Jam – catchy titles (particularly for boys), don’t you think? And I love the characters. They are unique yet real and I’d like to spend some more time getting to know them.

Oh the joys of a positive manuscript assessment! Makes me want to just keep on writing…